Fascinating and Disturbing, all at the same time

So last night, a friend of mine sent me a link to possibly the most messed up person I've ever read about. Seriously. The person blogging about the woes of her life has experienced homelessness, drug abuse, lies, deception, and a non-supportive family who has stolen from her and kicked her out of their homes and their lives. According to her, everyone has screwed her over, and it's not her fault that her life sucks. She continues to try to believe other people will save her, and when they don't measure up, she gives them the proverbial finger, shrieks at them through her blog, and rants about any and everything.

You'd think one post of that and I'd leave her site as fast as you can blink. But I didn't. I read another post, then another, and another. A half hour later I felt like a needed a shower to get her negativity off me. Yet I'd been glued to her ranting. Why? What is it about her train wreck of a life (her words, not mine) that I found so captivating?

I had to think about this for a while after trying to decompress from so much complaining. I think mostly I kept wanting to learn something good had happened to her. Then too, every time she had something bad happen, she linked to something else bad that had happened, so I was engrossed in her backstory.

And now I understand why so many people love tortured heroes. You keep wanting that hero to win, to defeat his adversity and come out on top. We love an underdog, and so we watch the bad stuff hoping for the good stuff.

OR maybe it was that I didn't think any human being could be so oblivious to their own responsibility for the things that happen in life. Waiting for someone to save you instead of saving yourself is a recipe for disaster. Like using another person to make you happy, or having kids to save a marriage. If it isn't working, kids and boyfriends/girlfriends or spouses won't fix the problem. Because that one problem that's consistent is YOU, not someone or something else.

Good God. I'd share the link, but I honestly don't want anyone to read her narcissistic comments about herself or her hateful venom toward her family, her friends, and her enemies. Now I wish I could scrub my brain clean. Ugh, Cat. You owe me for sharing that friggin' link! I'm trying like hell to think of something nice now. Kittens and puppies, kittens and puppies. Make it stop!!!